Mior came down to UPM (well, sekangkang kera je pun) to meet me and Hawa this afternoon. We had a long talk regarding everything Malaysians. Well, yeah. I realized that I'm not really happy studying in UPM. To put it bluntly, we don't have good friends. Friends who we could hang out with and talk and joke around and would actually understand us, and what we're trying to deliver. Especially those who don't easily take us the wrong way, like "bitch pls dont steal my boyfriend" "F no i'm not even interested" and SO ON.
I can't joke around lightly or even harshly with random friends I made in UPM (well, some). They will either be lost or offended. LE SIGH. I only had few people I stick around to, those whom I comfortable hanging out with. Those whom I often call up for lunch outings and stuff.
Mior told us that in his new place, which is Perdana University, he conversed in English. FREAKING ENGLISH. And he actually let out a SIGH as he was so relieved to be able to speak with us in Malay. I want what he has now. I want to be able to have good conversation in English. I don't want my English to be slowly deteriorating. It's shameful!
Oh well.
And we talked about a lot of different things. Hawa actually confessed that she wasn't as confident as she was back in RIT. I feel you, babe, I feel you. You know, back in US, we tend to speak up and ask around. But here, it's hard to do so. I can totally relate. Like, when we couldn't understand something, we usually ran around and find people who can actually give us good answers, or at least lead us to some good answers. We don't mind. But, things are different now. You can say that we're afraid to ask around as we might accidentally 'disturb' someone. And we don't know if they can spare some time to actually help us out without giving such an arrogant stares, which is very hurtful. Sometimes, people make me feel so dumb. Some even talk to me with that you-know-how tone. Like, 'how stupid can you get?'.
SERIOUSLY? So..*le sigh*
4 comments:
I feel u, gurl. Let it out. You'r not alone
you know pao, reading your blog & chitchatovercoffee make me doesn't want to further my study in msia ever. It's so frightening.
I do hope you, hawa, tira & mior will get through this (amin). Good luck & All the best!! :) You guys CAN DO IT!!
Exactly how I feel Pao! Sebab tu aku tak jadi register kt UM! huahuahua. Some people just brings out all the negativity someone might have, boleh tak? Aku rasa aku memang malas nak layan all that crap at the moment, not too desperate to continue studies now, soooo tu ah..and since grad oversea macam jadi target lebih je.
so much of culture difference
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